Tuesday Tip--Take it Easy

Have you ever taken an unintentional blogging break and then felt both more attached to life but also really missed blogging? That's how I've felt these past several days. I hope you all had a great Thanksgiving and are enjoyed a little time off to be with your families, eat turkey for any and every meal, and catch up on some (probably unnecessary) TV and films. We did Thanksgiving with a few friends at our place and it was awesome. But more on that later.

Only one week and two days left of classes and then some finals and this semester is over. I have a small mountain of assignments to finish, but I am actually looking forward to working on most of them (perhaps school has already melted my brain.) Coming back from the Thanksgiving break makes getting things done a bit of push though. I'm a girl who likes to stay active even on vacation but sleeping in and staying up late is a pretty addictive habit. So my goal over the next few weeks is to get everything done but in the least stressful way possible. Reading is one of my biggest escapes/rewards during busy times.

What do you do to relax?

P.S. In case any of you have fallen prey to the sickness of the season, try lemon honey tea. No recipe, just water, lemon and honey to taste. My mom used to make it for me and now Nick does.

Tuesday Tips-Be Prolific

I'm not sure if this tip is for you or for me, hopefully a little of both.

It goes back to some topics that I've touched on before, like the creative process and passionate but it's a little different too. To be considered an expert in something you need to spend at least 10000 hours doing it. At first you might think where would all those hours come from, but it's not really that long in the great scheme of things. Only 3 hours a day for 10 years, or 6 hours a day for 5 years. But I think expertise comes from both quality and quantity time. Be prolific and make the time count.

I love design and so I need to create until it seeps from my pores. I want photography to become second nature to me, to the point that I can adjust my shutter speed and iso in the dark. I need calluses where my hands grip the paint brush. When you're passionate about something you do it. A lot. Regardless of what your day job is that is what draws you back again. Passion will drive you when money won't and when tiredness and illness could make you take a break.

What are you passionate enough about that you want to become an expert?

Tuesday Tip- Be Kind

I've been thinking about the idea behind this quote a lot lately. In part because I've had some difficult things on my own plate and in part because I've recently had a lot of interaction with someone who has been negative, sullen and even unkind. This hasn't been my previous experience with this person and so it's been even harder for me to know how to deal with the situation.

My first reaction when someone treats me in a way that I consider unkind is to feel upset. It's easy to then label that person as bad/mean/toxic/whatever and just try to keep my distance. But I don't think that's always the right way to handle those situations. However, if the person is abusive or I feel unsafe then I can't have that person in my life for my own safety and happiness; but not everyone who is short tempered is a dangerous person and right now I'm trying to learn to forgive when forgiveness is not sought and to have a deeper patience. I think that most people are blind to what those around them are going through. It's so easy to see how someone acts and define them by that. It's much harder to give someone the benefit of the doubt.

When I have things going on in my personal life I don't really share them with people who aren't in my innermost circle. I'm private in many circumstances (which may make me something of a walking contradiction), but I get sad and have hard times like anyone else. I just don't usually show it, unless I'm cracking at the edges and then I can't help but do so. But different people react to life in their own way. This isn't a license to treat people poorly because I'm having a "bad" day, but it is my ongoing job to try to be kind even when others aren't.

Original image is a painting by Robert Roth, whose art I love. This one is part of a series of abstract-ish landscapes

Tuesday Tips--Don't expect mind reading

Guess what?!

In case you haven't learned yet--guys don't read minds. At least mine doesn't. I actually have to talk to him and sometimes blatantly hint when I want him to do certain things.

I have yet to come home to a surprise candlelit dinner or tickets to a concert with that one band I love or a new dress laid out and a note telling me to be ready for the night of my life by seven. I didn't marry that guy. (If he even exists.)

Instead I married the guy who wants to rub my feet because that's what he grew up seeing his dad do for his mom. I married the guy who will drive all around--even though he is not the world's best solo navigator--to get my film processed so that I can do homework in between classes. The guy who makes breakfast and lunch for us almost every single day. The guy who can make my headaches ease just by kissing my temples and being close to me. And you know what? I'm glad that of all the superpowers he doesn't have mind reading is one of them--it's too Edwardian anyway. I'd much rather tell him to look at my Pinterest board or play "Which dress would Alison want" when we're in Anthropologie than have to give up the heroic things he already does so well.

P.S. This picture was taken last night for my photography class. Our assignment was to photograph the person who means the most to us. It felt like the right image for this post. Multitasking at its finest.

Tueday Tips--Don't Give Up

The last few days have been rather excruciating. I wish I could share more right now, but every time that I try to I feel angry and sad and defeated, so maybe I'm not ready to share. At least until I have some resolution. But the biggest lesson that I have learned in my not-so-easy life is to not give up. It's very tempting to want to lie down and cry and burrow into covers and oblivion. And I have done it both ways when faced with painful/crushing/suffocating situations. But I've never overcome anything when I was burrowing. Sometimes I don't overcome the problem even when I'm standing upright and doing everything in my power, but at least I'm trying.

Tuesday Tips--Do it right now

Sometimes I get behind on things that I mean to do. The further behind the more I feel drowned by the task and then unwilling and unable to conquer it on my own. Sometimes the task is an assignment, sometimes it's answering an email, and sometimes it's more mundane household chores like dishes or laundry.

I've decided that I need to stop letting the fact that I haven't done something be my excuse for continuing to not do it. I can start right now. It doesn't have to be perfect but it has to be something more than I have done.

What do you need to do right now?

Tuesday Tips--On Succeeding

Do what works for you. Don't set yourself up for failure. Put yourself in a position that will give you the results you want. For example, I like to run and exercise in a general way. I do not like being smothered, even at 6am, by humid air. So if I plan to run and then don't get ready until 8am (hah 10am) I'm not likely to actually get much good out of any workout that I do, if I do even end up running. So we got a gym pass last week and I'm currently loving air conditioning, treadmills and knowing how far and hard I'm really running.

Another example: I sometimes have a really hard time waking up in the mornings. I have my routine down to the nanosecond so that I can just get up and race, tornado-like, around my house and get out the door just in the "Nick" of time. Lately I've wanted to photograph the early morning light, but  when the alarm clock chirped I usually hit snooze because the cost outweighed the benefits. And yet those pictures are of the sunrise, not sunset. I've been awake for three sunrises in the last two weeks by being awake on the "wrong" side of morning rather than getting up early. Do what works for you.

Tuesday Tips-Thrifting

A couple weeks ago, for our anniversary, Nick let me choose what to do. Since we were in a big(ger) city than normal I wanted to hit a few thrift stores. And Nick was a complete trooper about shopping for hours. We scored quite a few good finds (many clothes-es for me) including the above. Thrift stores are the perfect place to find games, since they don't get worn out like other things, people just get bored of them or lose key pieces. I also like to look for DVDs when I go thrifting. (So cheap!) The pair of shoes were too good to pass up—real leather and only six bucks—so even though they didn't fit Nick I snagged them for a certain giant of a little brother that I have in Chicago.

We've already played Scattegories three times since we bought and love it. It's joined our other group of word games, which include Catch Phrase and Scrabble.